“I spoke before the despot’s name
Emblazoned on his sign,
To indicate there is no shame,
Emoluments are fine,
“Regardless of whatever clause
Stands in the Constitution;
Such ‘fine distinctions’ writ in laws
Can stand for diminution.
“It may be that I am a judge
But also am a man,
Without the need to be a drudge:
You take ‘gifts’ as you can.
“Why, ought a judge spew diatribes
Against a president?
He has a right to petit-bribes
From foreign government.
Well, not the ‘right’ per se as written
In that foundation parchment,
And—while ‘originalist’—I’m smitten
With latitude, enlargement.
“Emoluments, bribes, are okay,
And cheats to win a seat,
Neglectful death, if to defray
The corporate balance sheet.
“The audience applauded me
With ‘Gorsuch, he’s our man!’
But I don’t work for salary—
You take gifts as you can.